Did We Choose A Partner Similar To Our Parents?

What factors do we take into account when choosing a partner? Clearly, tastes and preferences are included. But some scholars suggest that this choice is also related to the examples we receive from our parents.
Did we choose a partner similar to our parents?

Young people spend a large part of their lives with their parents.  They are with them mainly in the stage of growth and creation. During childhood, the only reference that couples see is their parents.

For this reason it should not be strange for us that very young people, when they grow up, choose a partner with similar characteristics to their parents.

But where does the idea come from that we choose a partner similar to our parents?

The evolution of the emotional realm

Adults guide their emotions and feelings based on their learning and upbringing. This explains the willingness of young people to seek a partner to share life with physical characteristics and personality very similar to their parents.

Without realizing it and without seeking it, young people fall in love with people who act, in a way, like their parents. Many people when they know this get scared and the first thing they do to react to this information is to deny it.

Generally, they think it’s impossible for this to be true, but it’s scientifically proven.

This does not mean that children fantasize or are attracted to their parents. It is a matter of custom and upbringing.

Children, when they see an adult performing an action, repeat it because they believe it is right to do so. It is about following the example and repeating the pre-set patterns.

Did we choose a partner similar to our parents?

Lasting relationships as an example

For this reason, the example parents set for their children is so important. Growing up seeing a healthy relationship, in which the couple respects and loves each other, drives them to also want to be in a relationship like this.

When children are young, things related to love are not pleasing to them. When they grow up, they understand that to be happy as a couple, you just need to be guided by your parents’ relationship.

Likewise, it is essential that children do not grow up witnessing a conflicting relationship. Any examples that are negative during your creation will reflect and influence your personal decisions.

Adults will seek how to heal their wounds and childhood pain through their parents’ relationship. Most likely, they end up having conflicting relationships as well.

What is the reason why we choose a partner similar to our parents?

According to scientific research, statistically it is likely that the ideal partner is based on the common characteristics of your parents.

American scientists claim that there is a connection between the couples’ genetic material.

In addition to the scientific cause, it is necessary to analyze and understand the creation itself. This is one of the reasons why couples choose each other, according to characteristics in common with their parents.

A life based on love and respect

Basically, there is a reason why we adults choose a partner similar to our parents. If we have always seen our parents aging happily and providing us with love and affection, it is normal for us to seek the same for ourselves.

If the parents have treated them with tenderness since childhood, it is understandable that they create a great bond with each other.

If, in addition, the father or mother provides food for the home and covers basic needs, it is logical that they become an example. Unconsciously, the child, as he grows up and falls in love, will try to look for the same role in the other person.

Did we choose a partner similar to our parents?

The reason is that it is thought that this person will not harm you because the person relies on their emotions and their learning to guide them. If, since you were a child, you’ve been happy with someone like that, then you’ll want to spend the rest of your life in the same way.

the ideal couple

The ideal couple doesn’t necessarily need to look like their parents physically. What is certain is that the partner with whom we want to spend our whole life will have similar traits to the parents, if the parents have managed to act as such.

In this case, the attraction may arise from the psychological similarity of the couples and the parents.

Choosing a partner according to parent-like characteristics can be difficult to understand. However, it is positive that we can choose companions that fit our personality and style, albeit unconsciously.

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


Back to top button