My Friends Don’t Like My Boyfriend: What Do I Do?
You met someone and started a relationship. Sooner or later, you’ll have to introduce your new boyfriend to your circle of trust. This is an indispensable step to strengthen the bond.
However, when the time comes and things don’t go as you imagined, a worry echoes in your head: “My friends don’t like my boyfriend. And now what do I do?”.
If they are old friends and there is a lot of trust, they will tell you directly. If they don’t know how to say it, they will demonstrate it somehow.
For that reason, it ‘s important to take the time to get together with your friends and allow them to voice their concerns out loud. Always with respect, of course.
My friends don’t like my boyfriend: how to approach the problem?
Before talking to your friends, it would be good to answer a few questions. For example: what do my friends mean to me? What do they think of other couples? What is the reason why my friends don’t like my boyfriend? Is my boyfriend aware? What does he think about that?
Sometimes friends are like sisters. This is not necessarily positive if we think of the family as a place of restriction or oppression of freedoms. And when the circle of friends is formed as a kind of clan, the arrival of someone new must pass many tests to gain approval.
However, do you think this is the reason why your friends don’t feel kinship with your boyfriend? If so, it probably wouldn’t even bother you.
Of course, it’s impossible to please everyone or fit into all groups. If you’re dating and this person makes you feel good about yourself, maybe the rest is just a matter of time.
Reflect on romantic love
There is something very important that every person must do when in a relationship: question their own concept of love. And especially the idea of romantic love.
The objective of the inquiry is to find a solid and realistic base, capable of providing well-being. This helps to clarify the picture, getting rid of outdated concepts and leaving idealizations behind.
In other words, you cannot hope to build a true relationship with medieval ideas in the 21st century.
People who think that love is synonymous with emotional dependency, jealousy, humiliation, suffering, loss of individuality and self-love are wasting their time.
So, having already considered the concept of romantic love, it would be good to think about how your ideas and expectations fit into reality.
And do you like your boyfriend?
If you identify with the “my friends don’t like my boyfriend” dilemma, it’s important that you seriously consider whether you like your boyfriend. Remember that in any relationship it is important to have well-being.
And as far as your boyfriend is concerned, depending on your answer to most of the following questions, maybe you should listen to your friends.
- Do you feel respected or criticized in every decision you make?
- Does he love you the way you are or is he constantly finding fault?
- Does he like you to have friends or does he want to spend 24 hours a day with you?
- Does he laugh a lot or is he a person who suffers, bitter and cries beside you?
- Are you afraid that he will get angry and avoid confronting him?
- Is he impulsive or does he like to reflect on important steps in his life?
- Does he care about you, your needs, your moments, your fears, or does he avoid you whenever you ask for help?
Find a balance between what your friends say and what you think, feel and experience with your boyfriend. Don’t invalidate the opinions of others, but don’t get carried away by each and every word you hear. Talk to your friends, communicate with your boyfriend, but most of all, be honest with yourself.
